Sometimes, even after you have put you heart and soul into something, the outcome isn’t what you expected.

Take my current mission to hit target again by the time I reach 50.

I really want to be at my target weight by the time I go out for dinner on my birthday.  That is now only 6 weeks away.  I set myself a realistic target of 2lb a week.  I should reach target with a couple of weeks to spare, which gives me a contingency.  Well that was the plan!

Last week I made the conscious decision to make sure I wrote everything down that I ate.  I planned every meal.  I have the new SP Sensations cookbook from Slimming World as you know, and this was a true inspiration for me.

Every day I took breakfast and lunch to work with me.  For snacks I had plenty of fruit.  I had cleared the house of all temptation, so at night even if I felt tempted, there was nothing in.  When I was peckish one day, I popped to Sainsburys and bought a pack of sliced ham!  I kid you not!!

I had made a great decision that I would use my syns this time round.  Previously, I would try and get through the week without having a syn.  If I did, it was never on meals, but treats.  To help me keep motivated, I decided it was ok for my meals to have syns.  It would ensure I was able to have variety and keep me focused.

The meals I had were amazing.  Even hubby enjoyed them.  Many of them are on my Youtube channel for you to enjoy.

I wear a Fitbit so tracked my steps.  On average around 15000 steps a day.  It is easy for me to keep active with 2 border collies to exercise. I also go to the gym in my lunch break.  It all helps to burn those calories off.

In the evenings, I would try and make sure that I found 30 minutes to do sit-ups.  Usually this would be in front of the TV whilst catching up on one of my soaps.  I think last night was the only night I missed, as I just didn’t have even 5 minutes to myself!

We had a work event where cakes were in abundance.  I opted for the fruit bowl.  Later on, there was a basket of pretzels and fruit and nut.  I picked up a pack of each.  Before I opened them, I checked on my Slimming World App.  The pretzels were 4 syns.  I couldn’t find the fruit and nut, so looked at the back of the packet.  They were 250 calories.  That is potentially 13 syns!  Wow.  I was not wasting my syns on that.  I did decide though that as I hadn’t got any syns planned for the day so far, I would treat myself to the pretzels

I really don’t think I could have done any more than I did last week.

I arrived at my weigh in just as they were about to start group due to my train being late!  I was a bit flustered already.  As I stood on the scales, I watched the numbers!  Half a pound on!  That is right, on!  I literarily had to hold back the tears.  If my hubby hadn’t have dropped me off and wasn’t coming back for an hour, I think I would have turned around and left!  As it was, I sat in the group furious.

I looked at my food journal.  I read all my meals and snacks.  How on earth had I gained?  My consultant asked me what I could do differently this week.  Did I want an SOS log.  No, I didn’t and nothing could be different.  I had followed the plan.  I had been really good.

Suddenly I was no longer motivated.  I was never going to lose that last 11 pound now! 

I left group and went home.  I could have hit self-destruct, but thankfully there was nothing in the house for me to have.

All night it was going around in my head.  How could I do the plan and put on!

The next morning, I looked in the mirror.  Yes, I want that 11 pounds but if I don’t get it, it is ok.  As long as I can honestly say I’d tried.  My body has obviously decided it didn’t want to lose the weight this week.

If I quit now, how would I feel.  I’m gutted now and I had really tried.  If I gave in now, I would feel a million times worse. 

I’m not in a great head space at the moment because of this knock back, but it isn’t going to beat me.  I’m going to continue for the next 6 weeks.  I may not get the 11 pounds, but for every pound I do lose, I’m going to be a step closer.

Sometimes life doesn’t always go to plan.  That doesn’t mean you have to give up.  What doesn’t kill you, makes you stronger.  It’s a saying I always live by.

So, the week ahead, I’m still on plan.  I’m still writing it down and I’m still exercising.  Hopefully the scales will be kind to me this week.  Whatever happens, I’m keeping the reason I want this in my mind.  It is to feel the best I can the day I turn 50!

So guys, don’t quit – be true to yourself.  Keep going!  It will all be worth it.

See my personal account on my Youtube video when it is published tomorrow.